You know you’ve condemned your child to a lifetime...

You know you’ve condemned your child to a lifetime of endless badassery, when you name him Ulysses.

Some quick facts about Ulysses S. Grant:

He was born in Point Pleasant, Ohio.
He is widely regarded as a military genius.
He basically won the American Civil War as a General and helped stabilize the country afterwards in his two terms as president.
He won passage of and helped enforce the 15th amendment.
He effectively destroyed the Ku Klux Klan (Yes, it came back, but not until decades later).
His face is on the $50.
He had a proper presidential beard.

I wonder what he’s doing now…